For anyone that doesn’t know my story, I was a journalist all my working life until the age of 37, before walking out of my 9-5 and becoming an escort. I wrote two books and outed myself and here we are.
It’s safe to say I know men. You could say becoming an escort is a crash course in knowing men and working out what goes on inside their brains (and you-know-what). I know what makes them tick, I know how they think, and I know what they want.
My clients are a bit of everything; married, divorced, single, widowed, from all ages and all backgrounds. Their needs are all the same (I’ve spoken at length about their needs…). Is seeing an escort cheating? Absolutely it is. If a client tells me it’s not my response is always the same ‘great! Let’s call your wife then…”
The balls of men (no pun intended) never fails to shock me. One client was staying at a fancy hotel, I glanced around and noticed high heels and make up lying around. Cross dresser or…? “She’s gone to David Jones, she will be gone a few hours,” he smirked. I left. I don’t care what they look like, but dickheads I can’t tolerate.
Another one I remember was the guy who turned up at my door quite clearly in a rush. “I’ve told her I’ve gone to get dinner…”
I can’t help but wonder; do these men actually want to get caught, or are they opportunists? Do they get some kind of thrill that she may walk in, or do they actually want her to?
I could list all the times this has happened, but I’m writing a column not a book. My point is this: with all the sneaking around, with all the lies and cheating I’ve witnessed from men, do I still trust them? Absolutely I do. Do I believe true love exists? Yes, I do. Do I want to be in a committed loving relationship one day? Possibly, but is it possible? Yes, it is.
It’s easy for you to read this and think “They’re all cheating bastards!” And yes, a lot of them do cheat, for a host of reasons, boredom, need variety, desperately unhappy in their marriages, lonely, or just plain opportunists…whatever. But not all men. Definitely not all men. I can only talk about the ones I see, not the ones I don’t.
It would be very easy for me to judge men. It would be very easy for me to lose all trust in them and think they are a bunch of cavemen that are ruled with what’s downstairs- and I won’t lie, a lot of them are.
But I also know men that love their partners, that wouldn’t even think about cheating. That sure, double take at a hot chick, but just leave it there. I’ve dated men that have checked out every bloody woman that walked past – so much so that for one of them, I grabbed a pair of his Prada sunnies and snapped them in two – but I also know he was loyal.
Many of my friends are married. Their husbands are the most beautiful, kind, loving family men, that while laugh at my stories and shake their heads at the balls of men, it is a world far far from theirs.
Men can talk the talk, but not of all them walk the walk.
So, do all men cheat? No, they don’t. What about women…? Well that’s another column…