I’ve always had a high sex drive, so dipping my toe into the adult industry was a no-brainer for me. No more vanilla sex! Instead I’d be wearing head to toe latex, a regular at all the swinger’s clubs..
Oh how wrong I was. How very wrong.
After almost a decade as Samantha X (my escort name), I can safely say this: I have never set foot in a swinger’s club. The only latex I wear are my kitchen gloves. (The usual request is jeans or active wear). And as for vanilla sex, ahem. Without wanting to offend my beautiful clients, let’s call it vanilla with a twist of cinnamon.
One of the biggest misconceptions about the escorting is that it is about sex. I’ve talked till the cows come home about how it’s about connection blah.
But this time I want to talk sex.
The one thing I have learnt as Samantha, and I’ve said before, is that men are actually very simple. Unless it’s a fetish (and I don’t see many of them anyway), they are very much meat and two veg in the bedroom department. What we think they want in bed and what they actually secretly want in bed are world’s apart. And trust me, 100% of them are just delighted someone wants to have sex with them.
So here we go.
(As always, I can talk about my experience as I’ve lived it – you may disagree and that is your story, but this is mine).
- You on top. Forget having to memorise positions from the Karma Suture; the one that gets them going is you on top. I KNOW sister; so many things to think about, holding your tummy in, the awkward double chin angle.. I feel it too! But relax. First of all, they don’t notice that stuff. Secondly, the reason why they love it so much is because they are visual creatures and they like look looking at you. Who cares about the wobbly bits because they sure don’t. Failing you on top, then number 2 on the list would be missionary. Yup. Should have stayed married. (I’ve never been married but you get my drift..).
- Taking the initiative. I’m not talking about paying for dinner or arranging date night. I’m talking about being the one to initiate sex. I know Bachelor is on but next time you’re all snuggled up, grab his hand and well, I don’t really need to spoon feed this bit, but Bob’s your uncle and Fanny’s your aunt and it will be well worth it. Sex is not about waiting for him to show interest – your sex life is your responsibility. If you want good sex, make it happen!
- Now I am going to try and be as delicate as possible here but we all know sex can be over pretty quickly. And may I take the opportunity to say here that the quickie certainly has its time and place. But most of the time, men want sex to last a little longer, and you can help them with this. I don’t mean sticking a photo of his granny on your face (although I am sure that would help), but instead stopping, starting, stopping, starting…taking time out. Say things like “let’s not rush this,” or stretch foreplay out a little longer. Make sure you get your orgasm first before it’s game over! (And by the way, you also need to show him how because if you don’t know how to achieve your orgasm, don’t expect him to).
Saying all of this though, I’m sure like millions of other single pringles in lockdown, any sex is good sex right now!